Freak OUT!

Hey there whoever is actually reading this!

Been a couple days for me to get back to this due to my weekend preventing me from getting reading for classes done – so the past few days I’ve been doing some rapid catch up. Tonight I couldn’t focus so I figured I’d blog a bit before bed.

Since last Saturday was so devoted to cleaning, I wanted to post some pictures I took (a bit lame, I realize), but I’m proud of it. Plus, it was really messy! Have to prove to someone, even if it is the blogsphere, that I am capable of cleaning and maintaining. But anywho, I’ll post those in a few days or something, I’m too tired at the moment to fight with my camera and its memory card.

I have also written down some topics I want to blog about, so I think I might actually be able to keep up with the blog this go-around!

So, title today is “Freak OUT!” The reason being that I am literally freaking out. Minor panic attack, of sorts. Graduation from college. May 17. Less than 4 months away. Bad economy. I need a job! A full-time job! With benefits! It is really difficult right now to find anything. Well, I can find jobs, The problem is that I am not qualified for 99.9% of them! Some want 2-3 years of professional job experience, most want super-high GPAs, internships, you name it. I’ve got 5+ years of consistent job experience – but not professional. I am majoring in Foreign Affairs, with a 2.7 GPA. Not great, I realize. I’m not dumb. I got into this University, so I must be at least “somewhat” intelligent. I am a quick-learner, a perfectionist, and actually like to work (though I may complain about certain aspects of my job).

Anything with the federal government would be great. Unfortunately USAJobs.com is confusing, and again, it is difficult to find anything truly entry-level that I qualify for. I have also been looking at non-profits and NGOs. Not too much luck there, either. And then I have been looking for secretarial positions through CraigsList and various regular job sites; can you believe that almost all secretarial job postings require 2+ years secretarial experience? Answering phones, typing, scheduling…Not to say that some of these thing do not require some skill and a certain finesse, but really? It is not the kind of job that is going to take you that long to pick up the necessary skills. Attention Employers: We can’t get this required experience unless you hire us!!

I will try not to bitch this much in the future – but the whole job thing simply frightens the hell out of me! With school work, it is difficult to find the time to looks for jobs, get reading done, do my job, AND maintain some kind of social life in the attempts to maintain my sanity!

Anyway, this latest freak out was brought about by the arrival of a Spring Job and Internship Fair taking place this Thursday and Friday here at the University and my non-existent desire to attend. Last career fair I went to was disastrous (recruiter for the CIA – I just wanted info btw – was a complete ass and told me my GPA wasn’t high enough to even be considered, regardless of the rest of my resume). Oh, he was an ass prior to his claim, he is not an ass just because he rejected me, just wanted to make that clear. Anyway, since then I have not had any desire to go back to any career fairs, and while I know I need to get over this (immediately), I just do not see much of a point in going. And I have class during the time of the fair, so I honestly cannot go. In addition to the career fair I recalled an info session for University Guides, a program started by an alumnus/alumnae and now endorsed by AmeriCorps. I had initially nixed it because 1) it pays $20,000 a year for you to help troubled or weak high schools increase their number of students going into some kind of secondary education (either vocational, 2-year, or 4-year). Not a lot of money for you doing a 2-year commitment. And the second reason was that I was not sure if I would be ideal for such a job – I get annoyed easily and while it is more of a counselor position than teacher, I never planned on going into an educational setting. But anyway, I started thinking about it tonight and was like “you know, no one else is responding to me, and it is a guaranteed full-time job, with benefits, for 2 years…” But I looked up the application and it and 2 recommendations and an essay are due in 2 days, so that dashed any chance of that happening. I cannot expect Debbie and Pam (the supervisors I have had at the library, and who love me) to come up with recommendations that quickly. So, I started freaking out.

Alright, that is enough bitching and moaning. Hopefully typing it all out has helped me some, so I can go to sleep without resumes and applications and cardboard boxes and jerk recruiters running through brain over and over and over again. But for some assurance, I took some tylenol PM so it will keep the obsessing brief, hopefully.
Again sorry about the negativity! I promise that it will be more pleasant in the future (though I am sure this will not be the last time I worry about jobs here on the blog).

Night loves!

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